I am an American by birth,
a Veteran by choice,
a Christian and a Minister of the Gospel by the grace of God.
What makes us who we are? What force sways us to make the decisions we make? Is it the environment we grew up in? Our parents? Our peers? God?
I went to the cemetery today for business and while I was there I decided to go see my maternal grandparent's grave marker. I am not sure what I expected. I have never been one to visit a grave and "talk to the deceased". As a matter of fact I tend to dismiss and even somewhat shun those who practice such trivial nonsense. Yet there I was stooping down to tenderly brush the leaves and dirt away, whispering words of love, affection, thanksgiving, and overall gratitude for the remarkable influence they had, and still have, on my life.
Even though they have been gone for 20 (grandfather) and 15 (grandmother) years my face grew warm and flush; tears stung my eyes but would not fall; and oh how I longed for one more hug, one more chance to say thank you, one more opportunity to tell them I love them. But, like David in 2 Samuel 12, I know I will see them again some day soon. While they were alive I fasted and wept for their salvation but now that they wait for me in the presence of the Lord I will go to them.
You see, in many ways I was their youngest child - not their oldest grandchild. They were my stability, my moral compass. I wanted to marry a man like my grandfather. I wanted to be the wife and mother I saw in my grandmother. As fate would have it I accepted God's grace and mercy - His gift of salvation long before they did. Was I put in their lives to bring them to the Lord? Where they put in my life to mold me into the woman I have become? The simple answer is yes.
Ephesians 1:1 Paul tells us he was an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God. Paul did not choose his occupation, neither did the Church choose his occupation or elect him to that occupation - he served as an apostle by the will of God.
Ephesians 1:4 When did God first start dealing with me? Before the foundation of the world. Charles Spurgeon is quoted as saying "I am glad He did it then; if He saw me now, He might have changed His mind." But in His infinite grace He loves us just the way we are. He loved us before the foundation of the world. Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrated His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
John 15:16 Jesus speaking "You did not choose Me, but I chose you and appointed you . ." Also Romans 3:10-11, Luke 19:10, and more. I am not going to get into election or predestination here - I am simply saying that I was put in their lives to show them the way of the Gospel and they were put in my life to mold me and shape me into the person I am today.
We are all chosen to do a certain job, Luke 6:13, Acts 9:15, 1 Corinthians 1:27-28. Find out what it is and do it well. Do it for the Lord and not for any personal gain. You might never know why.
As for my cemetery visit? I softly spoke words of love, thanked them for fulfilling their role, thanked God for giving me such wonderful grandparents and then went about my business.
